This whole process is transformational, and transformation doesn’t happen over night. It is different awareness’s that you have as you go through things. You start to integrate these new awareness’s to start moving forward.
So, if you go through each of these modules and lesson by simply saying, “Yeah, yeah, I get it,” yet don’t take the time to do the inner work, you’re not going to be able to take advantage of your own transformation! I really encourage you to take your time and go through each one of the lessons before moving on to the next.
Meditation was the first lesson. Something I said in that first lesson is very relevant to this lesson, which is all about self expression. The analogy I used in the meditation video was about the garden hose, remember?
If you have a garden hose that has been sitting for a long time, it will have a build up of stuff inside. That build up of stuff needs a place to go. As you go through this meditative process, you will experience emotions, feelings, and thoughts that come up. All of these will come up and need to go somewhere. That is what this lesson is about – how to express all of those emotions!
When I was first starting out a meditation process, there were times where I cried through the whole thing. I could not turn off the waterworks. I had so much internal pain, so much fear, so much doubt, and so much insecurity that was sitting inside. I didn’t know what to do with all of this stuff.
It was my tendency, at that time, to say, “I don’t want to feel that feeling. I don’t know what to do with this, so I’m going to stuff it back into the compartment that it came from and I’ll deal with it another time,”.
I encourage you not to do that. I encourage you to allow whatever is coming up to just come up. If you end up crying during an entire meditation, allow that process to take place. Your neurological, energetic, and emotional systems need to go through that purging process before they can go on to the next step that will really allow you to tap into your intuition.
That is why meditation is the practice to get to the place where you can be peaceful and quiet in a state of connected bliss, for even an hour! That’s where I’ve built up to, and it has been a process. I started out with 5 minutes and allowed that to grow and grow. I allowed myself to go through the painful process of my own awakening.
I will tell you, the experience of meditation and purging all of that stuff that’s buried deep within – it is going to awaken you to who you really are. It is going to awaken you to a different way of living your life and how you perceive things in your life. You will find that things that resonated with you before will no longer resonate with you now.
I encourage you not to judge anything. Nothing is good, nothing is bad. The thoughts you have, or feelings you come up, or even the way you perceive other people may change. Try not to judge them. Everybody is where they are. Everyone is doing what they can with where they are at in their lives, and with their level of self or environmental awareness. So, leave the judgement of yourself and others out of it. More specifically, leave the judgement of what you’re feeling out of it.
Julia Cameron wrote a book called, “The Artists Way,”. The book is about helping artists to express themselves from their intuition. Not from any place of having to create their music, painting, or any other way of expressing themselves. What she is trying to teach in this book is how to express from the inside out. From that intuitive place – of just feeling into whatever it is they’re feeling and expressing it through their art form.
I’d like to use that same premise for the work in this lesson and when I work with clients. We want to be able to express what is coming out. There’s a few ways that you can do this.
In my introduction video, one of the things I recommend you get is a journal specifically for this work. I encourage you to use this journal. It will be your personal tool to allow you to express the emotions that are coming out during this process.
Sometimes these expressions may be shown through writing down everything that is coming out of you – all of your thoughts, your feelings, and your emotions. Basically, your speaking your truth on to the pages of your journal.
For me, I was in a relationship at the time that was causing me a great deal of pain (not physical pain) that had me out of alignment in the relationship. What I didn’t want to have happen was to write what I was feeling about the relationship in my journal, for the fear that my partner at the time would read it, and consequently know my truth. I knew that all of the things that were my truth – the things that upset me, or pissed me off, or hurt me, needed to come out and be put down on this paper. But, I didn’t want him to find my journal and read those words.
So, here’s what I did:
I ended up taking the paper that I wrote on and burned it.
So, if you feel like you need to write things down, but you don’t want anybody else to read it, then you can try that too. Just rip out that page and set it on fire (safely, of course).
The important thing is you get your truth out on to that paper. When you hold on to that truth inside yourself, it gets held in your energetic body. Unreleased emotions within your energetic body will manifest themselves in some other way.
Our bodies are designed to express stuff. Whether it’s sneezing, coughing, or some other form of releasing expressions through our body. Try not to hold that in.
If you have things that you’re writing about that you don’t want other people to know about, get it on paper then burn it!
In the book by Julia Cameron, she recommends writing out 3 pages of free flow thought. The funny part about this tactic is you will start writing without knowing what to write about for that long. Although it may seem stupid, the trick is to write exactly what it is you’re thinking.
Allow your writing to flow freely from you and express your truth from the inside. Your truth needs to be expressed. It has been supressed inside of you for a long time.
Sometimes, what you’re feeling is anger or rage. Drawing is another way to express your emotions. At times, what I would do it get different coloured pens and free draw things onto my paper. Sometimes it would be scribbles. Other times it was pressing pens as hard as I could into the paper! All of those pent-up feelings and anger need to come out, and that was a great way for me to do that.
I encourage you to follow however you want to express yourself and allow that free flow to happen. This is your process. This is something that has been buried deep within you that needs to come out. It doesn’t necessarily need to be about a relationship. It could be something that’s bubbling to the surface as a result of this meditation.
Let the process unfold naturally and organically. Give yourself permission to do this work. All of those pent-up and repressed thoughts, feelings, and emotions – they’re hurting you. They need to come out in order for you to start healing and get back to a happy place.
Maybe you’ve never even been in a happy place. But, prepare yourself for a whole lot of happiness through this process! There may be a little bit of pain in the beginning, but, trust me, I’ve gone through this. There is a bright shining light on the other side. So, stay with me. Work through this process. I just had a thought!
Sometimes you can even record yourself on your phone and just say whatever is coming through you. Don’t try and force anything, just let it come through you. The whole point of this self expression is to let it flow up and out.
Don’t think too hard on what you have to say. Stay with it and it will come out. We have been so conditioned to squash it all down, and that’s not what we want to do anymore. We want to be able to let all of it come out. So, when to practice self expression, and how long for?
During the start of my meditation, I struggled to shut my mind off or get into the meditative practice. What I did, throughout the meditation process, was maintain a consistent and persistent routine with it. After meditating, I would have my journal next to me. I would write everything, even doodle sometimes.
Although I no longer journal, it was something that helped me immensely to practice expressing myself by getting my thoughts, feelings, and emotions on paper. When I was in my highest state of pain, I wrote several journals of pages to help me get everything out.
So, allow yourself to go through this process. To do this work and give yourself permission to create that space and time for yourself. Remember, you matter.
I know that you can get to a sunnier place. So, continue with your meditation. Then start doing the self expression in whichever form works for you.
I used a journal and different coloured pens. Sometimes I scribbled. Sometimes I cried my eyes out through the entire process. Sometimes I wrote. Sometimes I screamed into a pillow I was in so much pain. Whatever process works for you.
We’ve got a lot of artists out there. Maybe you want to express yourself through painting or drawing something. Whatever it is that works for you – the point is, express yourself and express your truth!
So, that’s it for lesson 2. We’ll see you for lesson 3! Bye for now.