Love and the new paradigm. Why the old way no longer works!
Understanding yourself and your patterns, healing childhood and past relationship trauma, feeling comfortable with boundaries, and letting go of people who no longer support your highest good, is more important now than ever.
Our world is changing. Humanity is changing and we need to adapt and change with it.
What we once accepted and tolerated in relationships no longer applies.
It used to be that we made the needs and feelings of others more important than our own but when you look around, it is very clear that this does not work.
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We can no longer take care of others before taking care of ourselves.
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We can no longer hide parts of ourselves we believe are unacceptable to others.
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We can no longer adapt to being who we think others want us to be.
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We can no longer deny ourselves self-expression.
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We can no longer hide our feelings and emotions.
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We can no longer look outside of ourselves for validation and acceptance from others.
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All for the sake of ‘feeling the love’ and that somehow we will be accepted and feel like we belong.
After all, humans are social beings. We need to feel like we belong. We need to be able to connect with others – not just on a superficial level. We are feeling the pull to have connections on a much deeper level.
We are also loving beings. We want to give love freely. We also want to receive love freely. It’s not in our nature to withhold or avoid love, be unkind, and be judgmental towards one another. This is a protection mechanism for our feelings of unworthiness and inadequacies and deep-rooted fears that need to be healed and released.
We know all too well the implications of low self-esteem, feeling unworthy and how that affects our confidence and the ability to be creative, do work we love, have healthy relationships, and thrive in our life.
We can no longer sustain pretending everything is alright and continue searching for things outside ourselves to push the discomfort and pain back into its cave only for it to rise again each day.
This is an old paradigm. This has never aligned with the essence of who we are, EVER. However, it has been accepted as normal but things are changing very rapidly.
Love and the new paradigm
Love is not self-sacrificing or judgmental. Love is a beautiful dance of appreciation and acceptance of who you are and who another is. You choose who you walk beside and call your person. Supporting and contributing to each others growth, never tethered together, each one unique, individual and free to be themselves, fully, wholly, and completely accepted.
If the old paradigm is all about hiding, fear of being who we are, feeling we aren’t worthy or enough then the new paradigm has to be about:
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Knowing that when you prioritize your mental, emotional and physical health you are able to cultivate much healthier and happier relationships.
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Integrating the deep understanding that you were born being enough and that inherently means you are worthy, (just look at any baby)
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Accepting that each one of us is ‘one of a kind’ which means you don’t have to be like anyone else. Who you are is already acceptable and if others don’t like it, that has nothing to do with you and everything to do with their unresolved pain.
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Understanding that every person is on their own journey, which means that sometimes you outgrow people. You outgrow who you used to be and what you used to want and it is okay to let it all go.
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Seeing that judgment of ourselves and others is only a reflection of our inner pain and fear that is being replaced with love and acceptance, and
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Having the realization that when you fearlessly speak up for yourself , have clear boundaries around what you want and how you want to be treated, you weed out those who are not in alignment with you and attract opportunities and people who are in alignment with you to come into your life.
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Collectively we are shifting into a higher vibration of love and acceptance. It’s unstoppable but you do have the choice to allow the shift to move through you or not.
This shift is showing all of us that we need to heal, let go of the old ways, have more compassion and understanding for ourselves and others, trust our intuition and be discerning about who and what experiences we allow in our life.
Sending you lots of love,
Iris
If the process is too overwhelming to manage on your own, I am here to help. Click the button below and book a free assessment to help you gain perspective.
Photo by Kalen Emsley on Unsplash